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Opinion

Bob Wehadababyitsagirl


  • By The Newnan Times-Herald
  • |
  • Mar. 04, 2021 - 6:38 PM

Bob Wehadababyitsagirl

The Newnan Times-Herald

My wife and I went to a gender reveal party last week.

We are a bit too old to have had such a party when we were “in the family way,” but we’ve been to a couple of reveals.

The first one we went to saw blue balloons being released from a box. This second one culminated with pink confetti behind shot from what appeared to be a homemade confetti launcher – eventually.

The expectant parents stood in front of their garage, holding confetti tubes. When I saw them standing there, I thought to myself, “Self, I was expecting a bit more out of this reveal.”

I knew the guy who’d landed the honor of putting this thing together. Surely he had something more up his sleeve than the two of them popping a confetti cannon off.

I’d read his “application” note to be considered for the honor. It was hilariously written and won him the job. I was jealous I hadn’t thought of it. There was no way this reveal was the best he could come up with.

The expectant parents triggered their confetti guns, and a rainbow of colors shot out. I knew the man behind the application note had not disappointed as the “big reveal” had left us no closer to knowing whether to buy blue or pink than before they released the cannons.

I’d also looked over at the master of ceremonies as the parents-to-be were holding the confetti canisters and saw him on the phone, so I figured he was up to something.

As the rainbow of colored paper landed on the ground, the garage door behind the parents-to-be began to roll open.

Standing behind the door was a figure wearing a huge wacky waving pink inflatable suit. He stepped out of the garage and released the only confetti that mattered: a whole lot of pink.

The best part of it all, to me, was that the man clad in the huge pink outfit is a fella who puts his life on the line for his community every time he goes to work. The same can be said for the guy who put it all together. These are men’s men, making sure the parents-to-be and their friends had a good time.

We were all there that day for one reason and one reason only. Other than what kind of gift the wives and girlfriends may buy for the baby shower, the color of the confetti meant nothing to anyone. And that’s assuming anyone buys anything other than diapers for the shower.

We were all there to let the parents know that they’d never be alone in this thing they call parenthood. Pink or blue, the baby is going to be spoiled. And that’s what babies are there for.

And this little pink lady has no idea the family she has waiting to spoil her.

Toby Nix is a local writer, guitarist and investigator with the Coweta County Sheriff’s Office. He is the author of two books, “Columns I Wrote” and “A Book I Wrote.” He can be reached at tobynix@yahoo.com .