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Ask Miss Pearl

  • By The Newnan Times-Herald
  • |
  • Sep. 18, 2020 - 5:49 PM

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Ask Miss Pearl

The Newnan Times-Herald

Dear Miss Pearl,

Loved your comments regarding the two boys and the bark collar. I felt much better knowing that my two sons — who seem to be stuck in stupidity — aren’t the only ones. Thank you!

There is comfort in numbers!!

Dear Miss Pearl,

How am I supposed to let my light shine when our world seems to be going to hell in a handbasket?

Now is NOT the time to not pay the power bill! Now, more than ever, we need to shine brightly for those who can’t seem to find their way out of the dark. Everyone goes through spells when their light becomes dim. When this happens to me, I give myself a good talkin’ to and pick myself back up.

Sometimes I have to do as my Mama says and put my big girl panties on. There are times when even that doesn’t work, and I have to bring out the big guns and spend some time with Tainted Lisa or Big Hair Betsy. They always have a good story to get me back on track and give me some much-needed perspective (not to mention there will be laughter AND leakage)!

There are times, however, when I just go straight to the Bible with a bag of Oreos and a glass of wine. The important thing is that you do whatever it takes, because there are always people counting on you AND your light!

And Another Thing:

I am thrilled that we finally have football back. Even though there will be no tailgating on campus, there is no reason why we can’t tailgate in our driveways, right? And we won’t have to deal with long lines at the bathroom either.

What concerns me, however, is that we don’t have the opportunity to play the Gulf Coast Junior College of Culinary Arts before having to play a conference game. All teams need a couple of “practice” games to work out the kinks while, at the same time, financially supporting a small school.

How are these small schools going to be able to recoup the money they count on by offering their team up as a practice squad to be watched on national television? And what about the small churches who count on people paying to park in their lots?

The domino effect of this %#$^@ pandemic is staggering, but I know I will feel better by wearing my colors and cheering for my team. Let’s all remember to play nice!!

“Miss Pearl,” aka Colleen Sprayberry, is one of Newnan's leading authorities on modern etiquette. She gladly lends her advice to everyone whether they want it or not, because, "After all, it's all about the children and setting a good example for them." Her videos are available on her Facebook page and YouTube channel. She can be reached at .