Dear Miss Pearl,
We recently buried my precious 89-year-old Daddy, and I am still furious that my niece let her two sons – ages 12 and 14 – wear shorts and flip-flops to the visitation. I told her it was disgraceful, and now she and her mother are not speaking to me. Was I wrong?
I am sorry for your loss and sorry that my editor does not allow me to use profanity (I sure would like to give your niece a piece of my mind)!
You have every right to be angry, hurt, AND embarrassed by this blatant example of disrespect. There is simply no excuse for allowing these young men to dress so inappropriately; and I'll bet their shirts weren't even tucked in!
Your niece is doing a disservice to her boys by allowing them to think their attire was acceptable for a funeral visitation. I feel sure the vast majority of the population agrees with us on this, and there IS comfort in numbers.
The fact that your niece and her mother aren't talking to you speaks volumes about them and doesn't surprise me one bit. Enjoy the peace and quiet!
Please send me their addresses so I can send them today's column… autographed, of course!
Dear Miss Pearl,
My across the street neighbor is always coming into my yard to help herself to my magnolia leaves. She has never asked me if I minded if she cut them, and last week she nearly stripped a tree bare. I've only lived in this house for a few months, and I am assuming she had an arrangement with the previous owner. I want her to stop cutting the leaves!
First of all, it is called trespassing.
Secondly, everyone knows you should wait until dark before you cut from someone else's yard.
Seriously though, your neighbor should have used her manners and asked you before she continued using your yard as her personal florist. And did she not bring you some homemade cheese straws when you moved in?
She knows what she is doing is wrong, and you have every right to tell her she is going to have to find another supplier of magnolia leaves. Don't be upset if she acts offended by your request.
Chances are this is not her first rodeo!
And Another Thing...
If love is the universal language then surely the explicit use of the middle finger is a close second. It's not surprising when a teenager does it – some people consider it a rite of passage – but I find it highly offensive when an adult does it. An angry man flipped me off while I was driving on the interstate.
There were two tractor trailers hogging both lanes, and I guess he wanted me to pass them in the emergency lane. Maybe he didn't like my sticker advertising a certain SEC school.
Maybe he shouldn't have had that second cup of coffee. Regardless of the reason, his gesture was certainly uncalled for. When he was finally able to pass me I couldn't resist turning to look so I could give him a great big smile. And then I scratched my nose-using my middle finger, of course!
Miss Pearl is one of Newnan's leading authorities on modern etiquette. She gladly lends her advice to everyone whether they want it or not, because, "After all, it's all about the children and setting a good example for them." Her videos are available on her Facebook page, and she can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org